Perfectly Imperfect !

the more i try,
the more i cry.

the more i avoid,
the more i hurt.

the more i say,
the more i stay away.

the more or the less
is never the thing that i care less..

Oh my.

Have u ever experienced a situation whereby u really wanted to talk, but you lost your words?
Have u ever experienced a situation in which u hardly acquired another party's response?
Have u ever experienced a situation that made your heart beat fast because you could not say what u wanted to say?

Oh yes, u will lose interest when the person you're talking to is losing interest towards your subject. Oh why? Why is this happening? Why should you be treated like this? Are you becoming such a boring, unwanted, annoying alien on Earth? What have u done wrong?

I used to believe in eternity. Sadly, people around me have not proved me that eternity exists. Their actions, words and expressions really show that nothing lasts forever. Kindness will turn into evilness. Sweetness will slowly become bitterness. Happiness will shift to sadness and loneliness. In the end, it will be a life of nothingness. That is the fact of life that we should accept. That is the fact of life that we should let others know. That is the fact of life that hurts the most.

The word 'forever' seems so far to me. I do not know why. Maybe you made me feel that way. Maybe you're the one that does not want me to believe in it. Or maybe you're afraid of 'forever'. Something bad has penetrated my mind and my soul. It corrupts the way I view life. It makes me see things differently. It makes me wonder of things that I should and should not do. But i really want to believe in 'forever' *Very long sigh*

Oh my. I want you to believe that there is eternity, there is forever and there is long lasting. Three different words but carry the same meaning. One meaning that makes you change your perception. Fortunately, the perception that is going to get born will light your way. All you need is, have a strong belief in eternity. All you need is effort, to make what you believe to become believable.

Why?

Why is it hard for me to have someone that really understands me?
Why is it hard for me to make someone believe that I'm a truthful person?
Why is it hard for me to have an eternal happiness?
Why is it hard for me to make myself a reliable person on Earth?

Why why why?
Is it because the way I treat people?
Is it because the way I expect people to treat me?
Is it because the way I think?
Or is it because the way I express my attitude?

Tell me all the Whys if you have the answer...

Stepping on the next step

It's been a while I haven't posted anything in my blog. I've been super duper busy lately and I did not have the chance to click on my blog. Poor me and surprisingly, Facebook has taken its place. OMG! I'm addicted to games in Facebook. Let me name them ; Restaurant City & Cafe World. Somehow or rather, I think that those games do give benefit to me. (eheh) Though the games are time consuming but they teach me on how to be punctual and appreciate every minutes that I have. If you don't believe me, try them out! =)

If you're the true readers of my blog, previously I prefer to post poems because I don't think people would in favour of reading my daily life events. And I myself do not really like to tell every pieces of me to the universe. They have more other important things to do rather than reading my words. Well, I understand that. People have their own rights. Since now I'm so available and I think, I'm going to shift the way I deliver what I feel, so, feel free to read my updates! Winks ;)

Okay.
Firstly, I would like to highlight this phrase which I think it is very meaningful.
"Kesakitan menampar dada, kesunyian merobek hati"

I heard that in radio. (Specifically, on my way back to Kb, from Bangi. Since I've got nothing to do in car, I had to listen every words that DJ said ;p ) All I could say, the phrase is wonderful. The words suit the feelings of a loser ( eh, not a loser, how should I put it more appropriate, erm, the one that is suffering from sadness. okay, that's better I guess) A few minutes later, it made me wonder and curious about how others react to circumstances in life? For Muslims, of course praying hard to Allah. But is there any other alternative that they do to cure the sadness? And how they channel their feelings? Or they rarely put themselves in a situation of sadness? Or they don't even know that they are in sadness? Hoho~

I opened the window,
I saw a green jungle,
The wind blew my hair,
The mist dropped on my cheek,
The sound of chirping birds touches my ear.
It was a wonderful feeling
but it would be greater if I had someone to share the same moment with.

p/s ; merepek mode!

Raya~

Syawal dah nk menjelang tiba. Di kesempatan nie, saya nk ucapkan,

-Selamat Menyambut Syawal
_Maaf Zahir & Batin

Yes. No. Yes. No

I'm trying to make myself busy.

p/s : 10 days...
It's more than enough to make the heart grows fonder.

Smile!

Smile for yesterday for you're still able to breathe.

Smile for today to know that you're still you.

Smile for tomorrow because the future serves blunders of opportunity and hopes.

Smile and never fail to give the sweetest smile of yours.

Tagged by Round Ring

JustforFUN!

1. how old are you?
Forever 21 ;p

2. are you single?
nope.

3. at what age do you think you'll get married?
Before I reach 30. insyaAllah :)

4. do you think you'll marrying the person you are with now?
I'm not sure. Better leave it all to Allah

5. if not, who do you want to marry?

dan humphrey!!! lol~

6. who will be your bridesmaid & bestman?
the name might come from one of my best buddies. kena cabut undi ni :P

7. do you want a garden/beach or traditional wedding?
beach! :D

8. where do you plan to go on honeymoon?

any safe, beautiful, peaceful, serene island :)

9. how many guests do you think you'll invite?
xleh ramai, nnt ade yg kna duduk dlm laut. haha

10. will that include your exes?
idts!

11. how many layers of cake do you want?
5 layers.

12. when do you want to get married, morning or evening?
Evening wound be great!

13. name the song/tune you'd like to play at your wedding.

Let the sound of the ocean fills the air :)

14. do you prefer fine dining or just normal spoon & fork? knife?
normal spoon n fork

15. champagne or red wine?
barli + cincau = barcau? heh :P

16. honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
The second option. It's good to be with the family first ;)

17. money or household items

Money money money $$$

18. how many kids would you like to have?
Beribu2 lemon. Wakaka

19. will you record your honeymoon in DVD/CD?
Definitely!

20. whose wedding plan would you like to know next?
It would be Nadia Shams, Ruhi, Kak Amie, Capik, Jebon, Syahirah Lalala, Fitriah

Not Alright.

Say it out loud if you are angry,
Say it out loud if you are sad,
Say it out loud if you are not satisfied,
Say it out loud if you are in doubt.

When you're angry, I'm scared,
When you're sad, I'm worried,
When you're not satisfied, I feel underestimated,
When you're in doubt, I feel the pain.

I know you are hurt,
I'm sorry.
I know what's on your mind,
but please stay still,
and don't leave me hanging.

The commons.

Telling the truth

is not easy

is not like peeling a potatoe

is not like squeezing an orange

but it is like removing your blackheads.

Honesty is the best policy

Very cliche'

very deep

very simple

yet, it requires a whole lot courage to be an honest one.

Love is only a feeling

certain people agree

certain say love is everything

no matter what love means to you

appreciate it when it's there.

The Initial

Oh I remember,
The first day I saw you,
The first day we went out,
The first day I smiled at you,
The first day we laughed together.

Oh I remember,
The first poem that you made for me,
The first song that you sent to me,
The first picture that you dedicated to me;
and the first promise that you made.

Do you remember what I remember?
That we wanted to climb the ladder together.
That we wanted to trust each other.
That we wanted to make us feel better.

Oh I remember,
The way you looked at me,
The way you made me happy,
The way you gazed into my eyes,
The way you made me felt alive.

Oh I remember,
Those wonderful days,
Those extravagant nights,
Those marvelous activities;
and the endless excitement that we both longed for.

Oh I remember,
that I said thank you,
and you replied "I will stay true for you".